12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
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