when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
I just found a bag of teeth...
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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