The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Randomize
