Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
