Do you still have your period?
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
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