So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Randomize
