I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
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Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
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