can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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