Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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