Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Randomize
