I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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