at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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