I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
You made out with two different species that night
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Randomize
