so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
