JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
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