Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
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