Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Randomize
