Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Randomize
