if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Randomize
