turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
