I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
