My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
