the new term for farting is butt boxing.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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