I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
