So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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