Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
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