i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
