I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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