if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
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