i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
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