so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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