I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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