The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day ππ#pensacolaproblems
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize