Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
