C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
