Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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