Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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