I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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