He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it