Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
