if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
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she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
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