I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Randomize
