I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
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