We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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