I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize