dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
