I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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