I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize
