Already got asked if we're dating
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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