so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Randomize
